My dad’s the kinda guy who doesn’t seem to realise that a lot has changed since some of his opinions formed (particularly on topics like sexism and racism) so gets up on his high horse and proclaims ‘I’ve lived longer, I know better and am always right’ and will beat down any opinion I have like it’s stupid and I don’t know anything, which is obviously INCREDIBLY insulting. So I kinda have to shut my mouth and can’t call him out on his bullshit.
So I’m lying awake because naturally bedtime is the time where I start thinking about deep and important shit, but basically some things are hitting me.
It’s really been bothering me lately that I’ve started realising how actually racist my dad is like woah. He has the ‘opressed are as bad as the opressors’ mentality, seems to think that africans are inherently stupid and violent, and that there’s more racism among poc towards white people because ‘ooh no look at all the violence towards white people look how mean they are to us how racist’.
And a few weeks ago he was showing me a video compilation of some previous black friday shopping mobs and said to me “notice the skin colour” and I kinda laughed because I wasn’t really thinking but it took a second to sink in and I was like woah what the fuck. The majority of a the crowds seemed to be made up of mostly african americans yes but that hadn’t even occured to me, I just thought wow what a bunch of trashy americans. The fact that my dad actually took a moment to POINT OUT their skin colour to me like it mattered and like it proved a point of how uncivilised they as a race are was disgusting. Race would never have crossed his mind if the mobs in the video were white. Stupid white people = wow what a group of stupid people. Stupid black people = wow all black people are stupid. Because that makes a heck of a lot of sense right?????? fuck. But no it’s ok he’s not racist because “they’re not all bad, some are well educated” and “I don’t HATE them”.
So yeah my dad’s an asshole.
It is December in Hawaii too.
basically my drawing process goes:
try to draw< fail< try some more< give up< comfort eat< cry< give up art for eternity
I just got a new sketchbook but I can’t draw to save my life help me
Have a happy, pug-filled holiday season!
i just heard a bouncing noise and then that was followed by my dad saying
"oh no my potato"
This would never end.
Rinko Kikuchi | Jalouse China (December 2013) ph. Jumbo Tsui
I’d hate to see her die before I get the chance to filet her myself.
it’s 2pm I should be getting up but now the cat is curled up in bed with me
Or, you can link your mind with the energy of all existing matter, channeling the collective power of the universe through your gem…
At least, that’s my way of doin’ it